Dying/broken/forgiven.... now I begin

Born: 17-06-56....gemini.... monkey
re-born: 3-09-80
born again\found: 14-04-08
other notable dates: 10-03-68; 03-09-87; 23-03-96;
1-05-98; 31-01-02; 5-04-04

Interests: movement, stressed/transgressive embodiment, lived experience (body\space\time\relation)
expression ( word, dance, text, image, story, music, poetics)
learning, yielding......

Hopes for the blog:
offer up the wild intersectedness of lived experience and engage others in creative, expressive, perhaps irreverant, hopefully playful, and respectful encounters....
enact kindness
create moments of pause for disclosure, discovery, stillness

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Preference

I see you gazing at her
feel the heat that used to be
ours
no more
no longer
strange
how that move to casual
( or worse, tolerant)
begins in one
seldom both
seldom simultaneous
you gazing at me
incredulous
that I would dare to make that first move
usually yours
for the taking
having been both
having done both
leaving by far the tougher
sentence
surviving remorse
seeping poison
every breath
a little death
grateful for your leaving
after all

14 comments:

  1. a strange and unexpected remembrance of things past.... and glad to be on the other side

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  2. Grateful for your leaving
    after all

    this takes time
    to arrive at

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  3. The wise eventually know that the time to move has come, even if it takes a couple of years to realize it was the right move at the time.

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  4. cutting poem...

    taken by the lines "begins in one / seldom both

    everything seems to begin (and end) somewhere... that it may end (and begin) somewhere else...

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  5. Punch and WM-- thanks for the comments and the confirmation of how time seems to work on and with the deepest of emotional places
    Jon-- yes, I felt a bit taken by the whole felt sense of that, myself. Your reflection is lovely and so authentically, reciprocally resonant.

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  6. This sums up how I felt about being dumped, and still would feel, if it happened. The sense of watching someone move on while you're still paralysed with love.

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  7. Madame-- thanks for this sentiment; I was also,literally, working on preference.... in this one, doing the leaving is far worse even though watching someone walk away hurts like hell.

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  8. Good one, my favourite clown. The problem is that we do not like letting go, even pain we have to mourn for.

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  9. Mariana--- yes, indeed... thanks for those wise words and glad to see you back. I'm looking forward to visiting your site soon :)

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  10. Yes, I could relate to the sentiments in this one. A fresh and very personal angle on a theme that is often cliched. Well done.

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  11. Perfect recording of an imperfect event. Universal, yet unique to the pair involved.

    This was very good - poignant, too.

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  12. I am glad you liked that, those are important words for me, please visit my site, I would really like to see at least a few lines regarding what I said in the last one.
    Hugs

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  13. Mariana-- I will visiting you soon.... would not miss your stuff; it's always so thought provoking!

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  14. Dave-- thanks for noting the twist on the typical, and for your comments
    Crow-- thanks for the nice pairing of perfect/imperfect.... I am not so sure of how perfectly I conveyed what was experienced, but I am glad the event itself seems to have been conveyed with some emotional authenticity

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