Even then...

SPEAK
YOUR
MIND

even
when
your voice
shakes...

third person

when she stepped back
talk & glory
moved on
without her
strings
pulling a melody
played in a background
more compelling
than silence

when she sees a bench
near the river
twilight flowing
sky & water
longing for kindness
nevertheless
terrified
she will choose
sit & watch darkness
gather fragility
easily
lean into story
holding the moment 's sweet
quivering
heartbeat

Sequoia

Graceful visitors
hovering above ground, roots exposed
unstable
in any language of certainty
(you) wouldn't stand a chance
singing solo
A cappella sighs
sustained in a generous space
choirs find connections
at the deep bedrock of longing
intertwining rides out the storms

underground, overground
onslaughts
chime down
to murmuring dawn
landscapes awash
with tranquil brown puddles
deep enough for a dozen sparrows
their little brown bodies quickening
into spiky wetness
their water play a frolic of hops, chirps
and fluttering
unguarded vulnerability

Let's watch them for a few minutes, you say
and memory, being the carnal tether that it is,
calls me back to every shared heartbeat
loving
how your strength resides in your unhurried watchfulness
a golden moment testimony
to the resilience of grass,
dandelions and groves
leaning into twilight
when everything has a chance to move

Without a doubt

without a doubt
my house needs dusting
my widows need cleaning
my floors need scrubbing
my study needs tidying
my garden needs attention

without a doubt
my commitments seem overwhelming
sometimes
my workdays seem endless
sometimes
I wonder what it is about "NO"
that is so damn difficult

without a doubt
I love what I do
I'm proud to be teacher
&
learner
simultaneously
discovering all that
I cannot do
easily
keeps me hungry

without a doubt
complacency
becomes
so
familiar
it is invisible

without a doubt
I lose
my edge
unlikely
without a doubt

Problem Solving

One of the great things about my job is that I frequently have opportunities to work in physical environments like gymnasiums and training centres and dance studios, and I frequently have opportunities to teach or facilitate learners in those environments in activities like games, dance, exercise and training, movement education..... it's quite wonderful most of the time. This aspect of my work life requires that I am certified in First Aid and CPR, and so every two or three years I have to re-certify in those competencies, since injury or death is something that all of us in the learning environment want to avoid.
So that's how I've been spending the last couple of days, re-certifying in CPR & First Aid [ this round with the added benefits of additional certifications in AED administration ( that's the layperson's version of sending an electric shock to the heart) and Anaphylaxis rescue] and experiencing the privilege of getting training that can make differences that are, literally, life changing. Scenarios are a big part of this type of training. Participants are given " real life" situations, i.e, simulations that are performed as closely to the actual crisis circumstances as possible, and have to respond with appropriate speed and correctness of decision-making and action.
During the pause before the scenarios began, we all headed to bathrooms for the pee break that necessarily precedes this level of energy expenditure. I was in process of finishing up my business when the person finishing up at the sink exited the bathroom AND TURNED OUT THE LIGHT !!! Now I am in a crisis situation of my own. By way of context I should mention for any boys who might be reading that girls have to take off half their clothes when they pee, and most of the time do it sitting down. Unimaginable, I know, but that's how it goes. That's my physical situation when the lights go out. I have to " feel my way" for the paperwork, the flush work and then had to spend a few minutes of tactile strategizing to figure out how to open the damn door of the cubicle.... is it a slide over latch, is it a turn of a knob.... the things I don't think to memorize when all I am intending to do is pee. Anyway, apparently, I made it out ( unless the phrase " super portable laptop " is going to move to a whole other level of meaning) but I have to confess that I did have to feel my way along the walls to turn ON the lights in order to wash my hands. Who knows what manner of horrific pee germs I left in my wake. Consistent with the tenor of the workshop, though, I did return before leaving at the end of the day and gave the bathroom wall a full antiseptic wipe down.
I suppose the moral of the story might be, by all means, preserve electricity, but please, think before you flick.