Dying/broken/forgiven.... now I begin

Born: 17-06-56....gemini.... monkey
re-born: 3-09-80
born again\found: 14-04-08
other notable dates: 10-03-68; 03-09-87; 23-03-96;
1-05-98; 31-01-02; 5-04-04

Interests: movement, stressed/transgressive embodiment, lived experience (body\space\time\relation)
expression ( word, dance, text, image, story, music, poetics)
learning, yielding......

Hopes for the blog:
offer up the wild intersectedness of lived experience and engage others in creative, expressive, perhaps irreverant, hopefully playful, and respectful encounters....
enact kindness
create moments of pause for disclosure, discovery, stillness

Friday, April 26, 2013

Drought



Cancer marches in
takes up residence in my mind
and my heart
 and my body
takes a breath
puts one foot in front of the other
does the next right thing
Priorities are over-rated

Treatments rally
soldiers in an assembly line
Slice, dice, chop, drop
poke, prick, zap, drip, pop
poison, rinse, swish, swallow
carve a hollow
space for time
this now on a rhythm
of its own
Schedules are over-rated

Take a number
effects exceed
any and all anticipations
cast asunder, scrambling
against a slow and steady
relentless trickster
pounding, overwhelming
Drugs are over-rated

Saddle up
thus begins the wild ride
crashing, burning,
overturning
preparation
navigation
imagination
Sensation is over-rated
Taste is over-rated
Hair is over-rated
Sleep is over-rated

Huddle up
Hunker down
look these two familiar strangers in the eye
& recognize them for the imposters that they are
abandon the myth of equal exchange of services
Ask for help
Accept it
Express gratitude and mean it
Be honest
refuse the seductions of bravery
minimizing
awkward moments
pep talks
platitudes
feigned interest & worse
Collaboration is over-rated

Cancer marches in
takes up residence in my mind
and my heart...
and my body learns
new "tolerances"
Euphemisms are over-rated



8 comments:

  1. Treatments over for now. Waiting news on the CT scan sometime next week. Feeling hopeful....
    thanks for all the good vibes

    ReplyDelete
  2. My first wife survived. My second wife didn't. She thought it was over-rated and waited too long. Glad you're not making the same mistake even if it is living hell for the moment. Hang tough. We'll see you on the other side. Sending good vibes your way.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm with Mr.C above
    Keep on writing it out - stoicism is overrated

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mr. C. -- thank you for sharing these deeply personal disclosures. I am hanging tough and appreciate the good vibes.
    Garth-- amen. I may have to steal that line for my next one!! stoicism is overrated. I will indeed keep writing it out. thanks for the support.

    ReplyDelete
  5. H---The time will come and answers with it. May they be the good ones. You have put yourself through this parade formation of marching to someone elses drummer.

    ReplyDelete
  6. WM--good insight; it has been a time line, a pace and an array of "activities" organized and implemented by the guys and gals in the white coats. Although I have to say that my oncology team have been quite amazing. Thanks for the visit and the sentiment.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Reaching for some kind of concrete truth is over-rated. In my two heart attacks, I bemusedly watched them all a flutter. I was calm and waiting for the next thing. I would have gone willingly wherever.

    Loving you, dear Harlequin.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Christopher-- so wonderful to receive sentiments like this... right from the heart. loving sentiments back to you.

    ReplyDelete